Category Archives: Life

How I am Teaching Responsibility to my Young Adult

Published / by Annie / 2 Comments on How I am Teaching Responsibility to my Young Adult

As my daughter Katie neared her 18th birthday the inevitable challenge arose:

“I’m almost 18!” she huffed at me one day. “You need to start treating me like an adult!”

“I’ll treat you like an adult when you start acting like one,” I retorted firmly.

This led to a conversation about what it takes to be considered an adult. I explained to her that able-bodied adults pay their own way in the world. They don’t rely on Mommy and Daddy to support them. While they may not be rich, they have bills that they have to pay and they do.

“What if I start paying rent then?” Katie suggested. “If I pay half of the bills, would you start treating me like an adult?”

After I recovered from my surprise, Katie offered to begin paying half of the household expenses. Since I live very cheaply, that’s not as much as it seems. Two hundred dollars a month during the summer months, with more added to cover the extra heating expense when winter comes ended up being the amount we settled upon. We are both responsible for any personal expenses and we split the expense of buying food and supplies (like bathroom tissue) that we both use.

To be honest, I agreed to this with the belief that she would keep up the payments for a month or so and then start coming up with excuses. However, over six months have elapsed and she has paid her share of the expenses cheerfully. As a result, I now treat her like the adult that she wants to be treated as.

This not only solves the issue of dealing with a young lady on the cusp of adulthood, it teaches her how to budget in a safe environment. I keep the whole amount for the bills on hand in the event that something happens that prevents her from paying just in case. Instead of my daughter moving out to live with friends who may or may not be fiscally responsible with their share of the expenses, she gets to live with someone (mom) who knows how to make sure the bills are paid regardless.

It has also made life as a single parent easier. Instead of having to pay all of the bills, they are now halved. As a result, I actually have money to save or to use on those little extras I’ve sacrificed over the years (I’ll write more on that later).

How have you decided to teach fiscal responsibility to the young adults in your care? Please share your stories in the comments below.

Moving On

Published / by Annie / 4 Comments on Moving On

Going back to work has been a surprising success. While I still have my issues I have discovered that I am able to cope for the most part and bury my secret breakdowns in my pillow at night. Even now I am worried that I will be discovered as a fraud and a brain damaged failure.

Even so, during the day I am still working towards my goals. Bit by bit I am catching up on my rent but in a way that allows me to have a little money to spare for other projects. I’ve been broke for far too long so I have to cut myself a bit of slack in the finance department.

For the record, I’ve officially written off the past two years as a wash. I learned the hard way that there is no real safety net in the United States for those who truly need it. Because of that, I intend to continue building my own safety net through my writing. Unlike the government programs that promise to be there, my book royalties are an income source that I know I can count on. It may not be a fortune, but at least it is real.

While I could probably fight and receive some money for the past two years I would rather spend my time recovering and planning for the future instead of chasing some pie-in-the-sky dream. I would rather do the simplest work than sit on my butt crying ‘woe is me’ to collect a check. I don’t need a lot of money to live here so if I continue to work towards my goals I should be just fine.

I hope so, at any rate.

Have you ever had to make a similar decision? Please share your stories in the comments below.

The Difference Between Men and Women

Published / by Annie / 4 Comments on The Difference Between Men and Women

There’s a difference in how men and women are treated in this world and it’s time I pointed out one of the major ones.

When a man says he’s broke, guys offer to loan him money.

When a woman says she’s broke, guys offer her $$ for sexual acts.

I’ve had it happen more times than I can count. Very few men in the world have responded otherwise in my experience, but the ones that do I cherish.

However, if either a man or a woman tells a female they are broke, the women generally respond with sympathy–and help out when they can.

What other differences do you notice in how men and women are treated? Share your thoughts in the comments below.