My life has taken a really strange turn since Thanksgiving. Not only has my ex-husband passed away but certain aspects of my personal life that concern the situation have also gotten very, very strange.
The worst part of the whole situation is that I can’t share what’s going on yet. Things are still in motion; I might jeopardize the outcome if I say too much online. I’m writing it all down in my journal because I want to share the story with you when all of this is over. Truth is much stranger than fiction in this situation.
Even with the chaos, I’ve got to regain my focus. I have something I want to achieve and I’m not going to do that if I allow my mind to keep thinking about a situation that is mostly out of my control.
With that in mind I’ve made myself start reading again. I’m not reading much, but every little bit of knowledge I glean will take me a step closer. I just need to focus on what I can do right now, with what I have, and let the rest fall into place as it can.
I initiated a transfer from my savings account today, emptying it for the next round of investments. That account only collects a portion of my royalties but it’s enough at current stock prices to increase my holdings a tad. That will allow me to make some more progress while I get through the holidays. Once those are over I’ll analyze my finances and invest a bit more.
I’ve also discussed having a will drawn up by a local attorney. I have a price now; I’ll work that money into my budget next year. I want to make sure that anything I leave behind goes where I want it to go, especially in light of what I’m witnessing since my ex-husband has passed. I may not have much right now but I’m no longer in the mood to take any chances.
Since 2018 is now waning I’m in the process of making a list of things I want to accomplish next year. The end of this year may be traumatic but it will pass. I see no point in allowing my current situation to derail me. I’ve waited far too long, had far too many false starts on a goal I’ve had in my head since I was a child to allow anything to stop me now that the fog is slowly lifting from my path.
I have a sneaking sensation that 2019 will be even more eventful than this year has been. I’ve grown so much this past year; I’ve experimented, made adjustments, and learned more about myself than I ever have in times past. I intend to continue that progress.
I will write more as time allows.
Nice to see you writing again. Really missed you
Hello Ajita! I missed you as well. The break allowed me to sort my emotions and deal with some practical issues but now it is time to get back to work. Thanks for being there!
Hang in there. I’m rooting for you.
Thanks, Linda!
Hi,
I’m sorry to learn about the travails you’ve experienced this year. I myself have just received a devastating medical diagnosis that changes everything and is upsetting all my plans.
In any case, I wanted to let you know, in case you don’t already, about the Social Security Widow’s benefit. I know you’re not close to the requirement age yet – I think it’s 62. You can get this even if you are divorced, as long as you were married for at least 10 years. It could be a higher amount than you’re getting for disability, if you do get disability. It’s been a lifesaver for me, even though I was divorced nearly 40 years ago!
https://www.ssa.gov/planners/retire/divspouse.html
Thanks for the tip, Karen! Unfortunately, we were married a mere seven years so I don’t qualify for a widow’s benefit. But that’s okay. I’m very thankful that it is there to help others. As for me, I’ll have to find another path to financial security. I’ve got an idea in my head that I plan to share with everyone in the future. I’ll need your help and advice if it proves to be something workable. For now, I’m just trying to gain clarity, testing it quietly to see if it is a do-able project. I’ll keep you posted!
It sounds as though you are living the serenity prayer, Annie. Accepting the things you cannot change, changing the things you can, and being perceptive enough to discern between the two.
Taking charge of those things within our control, and releasing the rest can provide great peace.
I wish you continued perseverance, and great peace.
Oh, the Serenity Prayer! I’ve not thought about that prayer in ages. Thanks for the reminder!
Nice to see you writing again and as inspirational as ever. Thank you, Annie.
Thanks, Karen!
I love this line you wrote “every little bit of knowledge I glean will take me a step closer.” because it reflects what I have felt over the past decade about self led learning. All learning is connected. All knowledge is connected. When you become an expert in one area….you suddenly become better prepared to understand other areas.
We are looking forward to the new year too 🙂 with all it’s mysteries and adventures.
Wishing you peace during this season of the year.
I have learned more from reading books than I ever truly learned in school. While I am thankful that I managed to acquire the formal education that I did, our current educational system doesn’t provide the practical knowledge we need in order to succeed in life. It is the reality we live in.