Getting used to the new look

The initial newness is wearing off on my head.

I have received lots of comments. One woman I encountered showed me her bald head, kept hidden under a hat. Cancer, she told me.

Part of me wonders if I should keep it shorn, at least for a while. I’m curious to see if perhaps there are others who are afraid of displaying their bald heads in public.

Most don’t even look twice at me. Guess I don’t look that bad. Wish I had some honest opinions, but right now I don’t.


Love Shave for my cousin

Hello all!

Here are the pictures of the love shave I promised my Cousin Dani. She had to have her head shaved for an operation to relieve pressure on her brain so I promised to go through baldness with her.


So far I have gotten a combination of shock, support, and a lot of “are you crazy” comments. Such is life. If this makes my cousin laugh and lets her know that she is loved, it is worth it. Every bit of it.

Already the hair is starting to grow back, so it itches a bit. Yesterday I was outside all day and so wore a bandanna to keep from getting sunburn on my newly-shaved head. I had to take it off for a moment, and ended up shocking a couple of people LOL!

Gotta love being different!

The first few pictures are after I let my daughter scissor the length of my hair off, and the rest are after it was shaved. I’m posting a before photo as well.


Looking to the future

Last night as I showered I looked long and hard at the hair which will soon be gone.

Part of me is nervous at the upcoming drastic change, while part of me is excited that I get to do something so exciting and new!

It has been a looong time since I drastically did anything to my appearance, so this will be very refreshing!

I wish my cousin didn’t have to go through it — but I am looking forward to showing her my solidarity.

She is back out of the hospital, hopefully permanently this time.

So far no more headaches since the surgeons gave her the shunt.

All is well.


Daily Update

My cousin ended up having to go to the emergency room yesterday and had to stay overnight at the hospital because of swelling.

They are releasing her today, and said that it does not appear to be a rejection of the shunt. She is still pretty swelled, but apparently in no danger right now. The doctor is more concerned with her picking up an infection if she stays in the hospital much longer….

I am glad she is doing better, but I’m still worried about her. Think I will stay close to the computer to wait for the updates.

My phone company sent me a late notice over the weekend, but for some reason I did not get a bill. Got it all straightened out, however. They figure it is a glitch in the system since they cannot even pull up a bill!

There is word from my old job that they will be hiring 200 more people, so I made sure my hat was in the ring. I miss my old job. May have to take night shift, but such is life!

Since the rain has finally passed, we turned off the air conditioners and went back to using fans to ventilate this place. Katie is happy cause it means that she can now go in and out at will again!

Updated my mailing address on my credit cards and stuff… got that all taken care of. It is a relief to know that is done. Have yet to locate the jump drive containing my checkbook records however. I know it is here, so I’m not too concerned – just starting to get a tad aggravated. Dislike not knowing where everything is! May have to toss some more things to make the feeling abate some! Well off to work on my day!

Food Personal

Daily Mumblings

I spent a portion of last night relaxing and listening to music, and woke up to an email that my old company is hiring more people.

So I have reapplied.

I enjoyed that position.

Also fixed homemade biscuits and gravy for breakfast, watched my daughter play with her beads (she actually made a skirt from beading today), worked a tad on the house and enjoyed life.

I am working on another painting. When it is finished I will post a photo here…

Peace to all,

Health Personal

Instinctive Fury

Someone posted something as a comment to my cousin’s post-surgery photos.

“Sorry to see these photos. Won’t show Ms. X. Hope the reaction is better.” (Paraphrased and names changed).

My blood boiled.

I have calmed a bit since that first gut reaction.

Like my cousin is so ugly people wouldn’t want to see her…


I love my baby cousin. I admire her guts in fighting this. I don’t appreciate anyone giving a HINT of not supporting her, especially when she is so self-conscious after surgery.

Anyhow, that’s my rant. I’m still furious, but I held my tongue for Dani’s sake. \l

Health Personal

My cousin looks like a borg…

…now that she has had her surgery. I wish I could post photos but she is a bit embarrassed at her appearance.

They shaved the whole entire side of her head and there is a tube running from the top of her skull behind her ear, down her neck, across her chest and into her abdominal cavity where the excess fluid will drain away. The tube is just under the skin so it is really obvious especially after the surgery. Behind her ear is this circle where a doctor will place a magnetic device that he will use to dial up or down how much pressure is needed to trigger the shunt, and should the issue be resolved, will be used to turn the shunt off.

Already she has had the rest of her long hair trimmed down to about an inch in length, and plans to shave it down to match the rest of her head when the swelling goes down.

This is my baby cousin, guys. She is as close to a blood sister as I really have, her and her siblings. Even though she was always taller than me and bigger than me I was the elder one. I always tried to look out for them when I would go spend summers at her house growing up.

Here in a few days I’m getting my head buzzed out of love and respect for what she is having to go through. If people don’t like it, tough! She is half a country away so I can’t be there physically, but at least I can be there spiritually.

I’m going to try to find some bandannas that represent me to wear during the interim while my scalp adjusts to the extra sunlight. Any ideas? One friend says biker bandannas would reflect my attitude best, and another says Native American ones. I dunno.

I love The Secret, and perhaps that is why I feel kinda strange here lately. I have my younger adopted sister who walks with a cane, my cousin who just had this surgery to have this tube implanted into her skull I gather permanently, and various friends who are diabetic and have a slew of illnesses.

You know what I have? A hormonal imbalance (controlled by birth control pills) and an annoying reaction to milk.

That’s it. Despite all the things that have happened in the past, I’m in the best health of my life at age 39, and here are all my friends and family so ill around me.

I love my health, I love this ability. Still at times I feel guilty because it’s like I’m some sort of superhero who is trying to learn and master their power and who feels great and wonderful yet those around her are ill and you know there’s a solution but you can’t force them to take it, cause no one is ready for it.

When I buzz my head I’ll post pictures here so all of you can have a good laugh. If Dani gets a good laugh out of it then it is worth it!

Sigh. I cried when I saw those pictures of my cousin. I worry about her so! She has already battled cancer and won, and now has to deal with this! As a result, she has left medical school after all of her hard work to excel.

Regardless of what happens, I am SO proud of her! She is fighting. She hasn’t given up. Even posting the pictures she talks about how “cool” it was that the doc would use this one device to control her shunt, and she wouldn’t have to have another surgery as a result.

Cuz, you are one brave chick, and I love you!

Law of Attraction

The “Secret,” – The Law of Attraction – it works!

I attracted a lawnmower today.

Manifested it with a simple thought.

I was tired of looking at the lawn getting taller and taller, so instead of begging my daughter to do it like she is supposed to I grabbed the reel mower and went to do it myself..

As I started pushing, the thought occurred to me of how nice it would be to just use a gasoline mower to get it over with…..

And a lady walks up. Out of the blue, she insists that I use her gasoline mower to mow my lawn.

Not realizing the significance I hesitate, saying I don’t have any gasoline right now and she says “so what? I have plenty! Come get this mower!”

Then it hit me. The law of Attraction. I had attracted that mower to me with that brief thought. Without another protest, I borrowed her mower and thanked her profusely. I plan to fill my little gasoline can in gratitude for their generosity.

So far I have used the Law of Attraction to manifest some clothes and shoes for my daughter, some help moving to my previous place, some extra money, a job I could work at home, this mobile home we purchased, and now the use of a gasoline mower.

I think I manifested something else, but didn’t recognize it when I saw it, so the opportunity passed. It was just too much at once!

I think I’m starting to get the hang of this! p


The Living Room

I have finally gotten unpacked enough to show the world my living room at least. I love the simplicity of the space!

You can tell the wallpaper in the kitchen needs replacing, it looks horrible, but for the price I paid for this place, I am definitely not complaining!

The goldfishies are by the front door, so unless you are first coming into the home, you won’t really see them. The bookshelf is by the little bar area, but I don’t have any stools yet. Over on the right is an old coffee table from my childhood – not sure where to put it, cause it didn’t look right by the seats, and I really don’t want to store it…

I’ll post some more pictures of my home as I take them…

Have a nice day!


Going bald for a cause

My cousin has to have a shunt put in her head for high intracranial pressure.

She’s worried about having a shaved head as a result.

This is a cousin whom I spent many a lazy summer vacation with, playing dress up, roaming the hills, watching the tube with.

I’m shaving my head in solidarity with her.

I know it sounds kinda crazy, but I will donate my mop to Locks of Love, and post a few pics of it. What’s a shaved head among friends, right?

Before anyone asks, it was my suggestion, and my decision.

My other cousin, her sister, is thinking of doing it as well.

Hair is just hair to me, but she is my cousin, whom I love very much.

I have about a week/ week and a half before her surgery. She has a couple of pre-op appointments to go to first.

Place her in your prayers, my friends. Please. semi


I Hate the Housing Projects

Some people must truly be miserable. Truly miserable.

Those people are the ones who cannot be happy for a person’s accomplishments, but have to find fifty reasons why they made the wrong decision.

I detest people like that.

I know some. Couple of them actually.

Okay, I am not rich. After an illness forced me into the projects about 4 years ago, I promised one day I would escape. And I did. Now I have managed to buy a mobile home. I own it, free and clear.

I am delighted.

What do I hear from these people? I hear how much “better off” I was when I lived in the damn projects, how much “better” the schools were in the hellhole I left, and how I’m going to “regret” this decision…

I wanted to call these people some serious names. I really did.

I am proud of where I am today. Damned proud!

So I don’t waste my money on stupid crap like televisions and video games. So I don’t see the pleasure in owning a bunch of trash that you have to make paths to wade through.

So frickin’ what!

Whatthehell, so I gotta be like them in order to be happy? Live like a rat in a cage kissing the asses of the government, worried that I will get evicted if a friend lets an animal set foot on my front porch?

Worried about who visits me and when, or did I remember to report that twenty bucks I made the other day, and OMG don’t open the damned door for the sunlight, cause the freaks will just barge in without knocking!

Can’t own a pet without selling your soul, and if that pet gets too big to meet their precious regulations too bad – get rid of it or be evicted…

I hate the projects.

True, it has it’s place. Its place is for people who can’t afford a place of their own, who are physically incapable of taking care of themselves, whose only income is a couple hundred dollars in child support or a disability check, or the retired ones who know they have no where else safe to go….

The projects are great for that. But for the free-spirited soul, who loves to go where she wants to go and do what she wants to do — hell no!

Do you know that they can force you to rearrange your house if they don’t like how you fix it?

And these morons think they are better than me with their multiple car payments and mortgage that will outlast how long they will be alive – they think I’m stupid for wanting the freedom of my own place.

Fuck them.

Fuck them all.


Still Moving In

Katie and I are still in the process of moving in. The heat has slowed the process down to a crawl but we are still making progress, however.

The washer, dryer and refrigerator are here, as well as several loads of other things. I want to get the last two computers, the kitchen table, and some groceries today. Some friends have been helping some, which is wonderful!

My daughter is exhausted. I have tried several times in the past hour and a half to wake her up, but she is still snoring. Guess she needs her sleep. I cannot complain, she has worked really hard to help these past few days. The internet is still pending install. I have located an unsecured wifi network with enough signal to use the phone, check my emails, and blog a bit. Will post some more pictures when I get a chance.


Katie’s new futon

Here are some pictures of Katie’s new futon when she has it arranged in a chair. It gives her SO much more space than a traditional bed! I understand more and more why the Japanese are so fond of this method of sleeping! It just makes economical sense to allow one space to have multiple uses, rather than housing a single HUGE piece of furniture only used 1/3 of the time!

My friends are all trying to show me various beds and things that we may “want to consider” after recovering from the move. They just cannot comprehend that we are choosing this of our own free will in a desire to have more space, and to stop wasting space for something we use only part of the time. They don’t understand that we are tired of lugging all of this junk around, and are looking for a more minimalistic lifestyle, and are willingly taking a page from the Japanese. We have no idea how far we will go, but we will definitely enjoy the journey!

Decluttering Minimalism

Thoughts and Memories

As the mountain of boxes grows higher in the staging area, Katie and I both are considering the merits of Greg Johnson’s life diet.

Perhaps we should start putting OUR life on a diet. A serious diet.

Greg started by putting almost everything in storage, then getting things out as he needed. The things he ended up not needing, he eliminated from his life.

We will have a little storage shed on the property. I have lots of shelving. Perhaps we could try that? Load most of it into the storage building then sort it out and put it away from there! It would definitely be a good way to start thinning out!

I gave the queen-sized comforter and sheets away that went with the queen-sized bed I used to possess. No point in keeping them, especially considering that they were too big for anything we plan to possess in the future, and definitely not our style (they came with the bed).

I did keep the black sheet set. It is large, but will work on the full-sized futon I am currently using.

I dream of a home with no clutter, with few possessions cluttering up our life. My nightmares are filled with images of the home I escaped, with my ex and his “collections” covered in a blanket of dust everywhere one turned, pieces of miscellaneous trash lying around and I was forbidden to “touch” his stuff cause it was so “valuable” – never again will I be controlled by stuff. Never again.


Packing for the big move

Friday we paid the deposits for the utilities. Saturday we gathered some boxes from local merchants and began packing.

I am amazed at the bulk of stuff two people can possess. It is just amazing to look at, especially with the knowledge that we possessed SO MUCH more before we started downsizing a few years ago.

Katie now has a futon for her room, just an inexpensive foam one for present. She is delighted at the fact that she no longer has to deal with her oversized bed. I am delighted at the fact she will no longer be able to hide masses of trash and clutter under her bed!

Right now she is kinda using it like a chaise-lounge. I am debating on the purchase of a futon chair frame from ikea for her. It may be better to teach her how to put it away and get her a beanbag chair or a papasan chair for use while she plays.

We decided to eliminate the dresser from our lives as well. Katie has a dresser built into her bedroom and I haven’t owned a dresser in years and honestly don’t want the burden of one now. The bed and the dresser are awaiting pickup hopefully today.

I have figured out a way to create a custom futon shiki-futon (futon mattress) that would actually be washable compared to the ones that you can purchase. Purchase or make a futon cover in the size you desire (mine will be twin since I’m single), then purchase a couple of those washable mattress pads or pillowtops. Layer those pads one on top of the other, and insert in the futon cover and voila! A washable futon. You can increase or decrease the thickness depending upon your comfort and preference by adding or removing layers inside the futon cover. When you wish to wash your futon, simply take the whole thing apart and toss in the washer! May take a few loads, but that is a world better than those futons that you cannot wash, especially for those of us who are clean freaks or have allergies!.

We are really hoping that the couch and loveseat are sold, for after we get situated we will purchase a futon frame for the futon mattress I am sleeping on now to use as a couch/sleeper in the living room, then I will make a smaller futon for my room. The smaller size will be easier to put away during the day, and it will be wonderful to be able to wash it at will or adjust the thickness! This current futon mattress is solid cotton, and about eight years old but in excellent shape. Plan to get a cover for it and add some thickness with mattress pads when we get time.

Last night I dreamed of our new home. It wasn’t fully decorated, but a lot had been done. The walls were an eggshell white, and all the trim was done in black, with a few oriental pieces on the walls. There was an oriental-themed wallpaper in a couple of spots for accent, and our furniture was set up just so. It looked so peaceful!

Once I get in I will post pictures of how it looks now, and pictures of progress as we decorate. This is getting done on a shoestring so it may take a while!

Well, we still have lots more to pack, so time to get back to work!


Feeling better

After spending the last few days in pain from allergies, I buttoned up the house and turned on the air conditioner. As a result I feel better than I have in weeks! Unfortunately, my wallet won’t be as happy, but sucking down decongestants and eating pain pills is getting nothing accomplished!

Sold another piece of furniture today, will turn it over when we move out…

Other than that, I cranked out a few articles for Associated Content (none I was patient enough to wait for upfront payment), and enjoyed feeling better.

Hope everyone is having a great week!

Housing Law of Attraction Personal

moving update

We got to look at our new place yesterday. It is in good shape considering it’s age (36 years old) but of course needs a bit of work. First on the list is to get the roof sealed up good, as there is no knowing when it was last done!

My daughter’s bedroom is very small, so will have to be very creative on space usage in there. Both of us have huge closets, however – and her room has a built-in dresser as well. There is an alcove beside my closet where I plan to place my computer desk – a pulled curtain will keep it out of sight when I’m not working.

The carpet in the living room is bright red, so if we keep the couch and loveseat I will definitely have to cover them to coordinate with the floor. Figure I can go with solid black covers. If I cannot find any ready made a couple of solid black sheets will do nicely. Black with red, and solid white curtains – very modern. The walls are paneled, and the paneling is old but will have to do. Thought about painting, but may just clean it well instead.

There is a bar between the living room and kitchen. A couple of stools and we can take our meals there in a casual manner. There are plenty of cabinets and a pantry even, so there is plenty of storage space.

When we start moving in I will take some photographs of the interior. The current resident is still living there and so did not want to be rude and take photos yet.

Got two more little goldfish for our tank. They actually have a lot of black on them. Katie bought them both for a quarter at the pet store. Our first resident seems happier now that it has company.

Need to get some boxes, but fortunately we weren’t really unpacked from moving here! A friend asked if we planned to move again in the future, and I told her yes, when we had enough money for a piece of land. She just laughed.

I am just thankful that this came true. I had placed the request for a two bedroom mobile home on the vision board, and like everything else I place there it arrived. I love my vision board! Who would have thought that the mobile home would have sought us out? Waiting for my next request now!

Decluttering Housing Minimalism


In anticipation of the move I have downsized some of our possessions. Meaning, I have sold several pieces of furniture too large for me to move single-handedly in my van. As a result, my queen-sized bed is no more, along with a heavy solid wood desk, a matching nightstand and shelf, both with glass shelving.

Beautiful pieces, all. Beautiful. But the desk was heavy and unneeded, the queen-sized bed entirely too big for any average bedroom, and the mattress and box springs no only too large to fit inside my van but too heavy to move myself.

The glass shelf – beautiful but a dust magnet. Every speck of dust would find its way to that shelf and make it look as if I hadn’t cleaned in months! I plan on replacing it with some industrial stainless steel shelving, like the kind you see in restaurants and in Duncan MacLeod’s place in Highlander the Series.

I have to clean off the desk and shelf and move them over there tomorrow sometime, but the bed and nightstand are officially out of the house and out of the way!

I know – what am I thinking, right?

Tonight I will snuggle up on a futon placed upon the floor and have a restful night’s sleep, knowing that when I move I won’t have to beg and plead and pray for someone to help me move. All I have left to sell are my couch and loveseat. They are beautiful, the Ashley signature series, but just too large and awkward for me to move alone! Honestly, part of me wishes that I had never agreed to purchase them, despite the fact it was an excellent price – they have been giant sage albatrosses ever since they arrived home!

I love them, I truly do, but I love my independence more than I do a couple pieces of furniture. After I get moved and settled in I plan to invest in a futon couch for the living room, which can be easily dismantled and moved should I EVER decide to relocate again.

As for my bed, I am torn. The bedroom has a small alcove, which will be perfect for my office area, and I can make it dissappear with a curtain when not in use, but unless I go with a futon or murphy style bed, that room will not be very multi-purpose. Nothing is more annoying than to need some open floor space and there is a big chunk, all covered over by a giant unused bed!

I wish I had some ideas for the area. I want it to be a peaceful sleeping area, which means I will be able to conceal my desk and stuff when I’m done, but I would also like to be able to keep the bed out of the way if I have company and we’re working on the computer, you know? Perhaps I will end up investing in another futon couch for my bedroom as well.

My daughter has already placed her order for a futon couch! I am wondering if she would be happier with one of those futon chairs, however. As small as she is it seems as if it would be perfect for her!

If I am able to eliminate the couch and loveseat, then the living room will be quite oriental appearing until I get settled in and recover from all of the deposits and expense. I have a coffee table that belonged to my parents when I was a child, so use it with giant black pillows surrounding it for seating! Nice and super casual, especially since we really don’t get that much company!

As for a television – we don’t have one or need one. We use the laptops when we want to watch a movie or something. Eventually I would like to invest in a projector and screen for a bit bigger effect, but that is not a major concern.

I am exhausted, but still need to give the doggie her last walk of the evening before calling it a night.

Sweet dreams, world!

Housing Personal

A New Home

Today it became official: I now own a mobile home.


Lock, stock, and barrel.

It still doesn’t feel real.

Someone is living there illegally, so I started procedures to evict them today. Once they are out, we can move into our new (to us) home!

My daughter is sad to be leaving her friends, but I am excited to be moving closer to more jobs, to be moving into our own home instead of a rental.

I am still pinching myself. This single mother is now a homeowner.


Law of Attraction

Do Vision Boards Work?

Just a thought before I go to sleep.

Several months ago I read a book called The Secret.  In that book and movie, it talked about having a vision board and putting on that board, things that you really desire.  

Well, we got a corkboard and put a few things up.  One of the things we put up was the schematic for a two-bedroom mobile home.  I wanted a small trailer we could call our own that I could afford.

After a while I ripped the schematic off of the board and tossed it aside as nonsense.  

Today in my life now there is a two-bedroom trailer, mine for a price I would be stupid to refuse.

Is this coincidence, of the power of the Secret utilized in the Vision board?