Tag: evolution

Are You Caught in a Monkey Trap?

If a monkey discovers a treat in a gourd, it will reach in, grasp it, and refuse to let go even if it cannot pull the treat-filled fist back out of the hole.

It’s a common way of trapping them, I gather.

Humans are prone to making the exact same mistake. We grasp onto things that do not serve us, to the point where it traps us into situations that make us miserable.

Part of that is due to habit and identity. For instance, I spent so many years living on as little money as I could that I had problems breaking myself out of that mindset when it was time to move on.

Another part could be societal programming. We hold on to things like clothes, furniture, food, and possessions because society tells us that it is horribly wasteful and bad for the environment to just toss that shit and move on. We’ll tell ourselves that we’re going to find someone to pass the items onto or place them in a donation bin but we never get around to it–and when we do, we ignore the cognitive dissonance of handing off the problem of “too much stuff” to someone else.

There are several reasons we could be holding onto something that doesn’t suit us. We could have been taught that divorce is wrong so we stay with an abusive mate. We may have heard that only sluts and “bad girls” wear cosmetics and actively dress in a certain manner.

Sometimes, we simply lack the courage to experiment. While we tend to experiment routinely while young, time can lock us into habits that we hesitate to change. “Why fix it if it’s not broke?”

There is a danger to this. If we refuse to change, to evolve with the times, we can become old and bitter before our time. If you’ve ever had a conversation with an elder who insisted upon complaining about technology, shifting societal mores, “kids these days,” and so forth, pay attention.

That is your future if refuse to let go and embrace change.

Monkey traps can sneak up on you. That outfit you wore when you were twelve. The furniture that belonged to your dead relative. The hairstyle you haven’t changed since high school. The types of movies you watch. The books you read. The places you go. The thoughts you think.

When was the last time you mixed it up, made an effort to do things in a different way? Have you ever looked around and realized that you keep the things that you keep and use the things that you use out of habit?

Did you decide to do things differently? What happened? Please share your stories in the comments below.

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If you happen to find this post helpful, would you consider sharing it with a friend or on social media?  Thanks!

I’ve written a lot of books sharing my odd view of life in hopes of helping others. My most notorious book is titled The Shoestring Girl: How I Live on Practically Nothing and You Can Too, but The Minimalist Cleaning Method is pretty popular as well. You can find them at the following places:

Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Apple iBooks
Smashwords (non-DRM)

Thank you for your support!

The Art of Evolution

When the economy tanked in 2009, I found myself laid off with bills to pay and a child to support.

Instead of becoming bitter at the fact that the world was changing, I evolved instead.

I threw all of my energy into a free blog I’d created to toy with, mastered the fledgling online-publishing field, then I wrote and published my very first book.

When it became obvious that I wouldn’t be able to afford to continue living in the house I rented, instead of fighting the inevitable I evolved again. I cast about for cheaper housing, traded for an older mobile home, and settled into a life where I would continue to evolve for some time.

I realized that, by helping others help themselves, that I could help myself achieve my goal of being a stay-at-home single mother. To better facilitate the process, I shifted my spending patterns, cutting my expenses down to a level I’d not anticipated.

I didn’t do it all at once; the evolution from Average American to Minimalist Frugalista was a slow process. I evolved by making one small, single change, allowing myself to grow comfortable with that change, then moving on to the next item of transformation.

By evolving, I turned a situation that was considered disastrous by many into an opportunity to achieve a dream. I thrived where many struggled simply because I adapted to the situation.

We are now facing a similar era of change. Covid has upended our daily lives. People are dropping dead around us. Employers are severely understaffed, and childcare is not only dangerous, it’s prohibitively expensive if you have access to it.

If you attempt to maintain your status quo, the chances are high that it won’t work out so well. But if you allow yourself to roll with the changes, to evolve, then you can come out on top of the situation.

Remember:

How can you evolve to better prepare for the future? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

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If you happen to find this post helpful, would you consider sharing it with a friend or on social media?  Thanks!

I’ve written a lot of books sharing my odd view of life in hopes of helping others. My most notorious book is titled The Shoestring Girl: How I Live on Practically Nothing and You Can Too, but The Minimalist Cleaning Method is pretty popular as well. You can find them at the following places:

Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Apple iBooks
Smashwords (non-DRM)

Thank you for your support!

Claiming My Reward

It was raining. The drips hitting the buckets matched the tears that flowed from my eyes, matching the constant drips from my bank account that threatened our very existence. I’d barely enough money for food, much less to patch that leaky roof.

I had kids to feed back then and a never-ending dread: what would happen next to decimate my bank account? Would I ever be able to survive in such a hostile world? Maybe I was dumb and hopeless; maybe I should just do the world a favor and eat a bullet.

It would make it easier.

I didn’t eat that bullet; I decided to make a promise instead.

I would do whatever it took to become financially secure. I would not only do whatever it took to become financially secure, I would make sure that I was free as well. Never again would I have to worry about kissing the asses of some greedy corporate giant just to survive.

In order to fulfill that promise I resolved to take my expenses as low as they could go and keep them there for as long as it took to achieve my goal.

But once I reached the end of it, I would have a reward. I would do something for me that I’d never in my life been able to do.

I would give myself the pretty home, nice wardrobe, and all of the things I’d wanted but I’d never been allowed to have. It would be my personal “fuck you” to the society that had told me that I was unworthy.

Like water, I would wear away the rocks that held me in the chains of poverty. And like water, I would be patient. I would wait.

In hindsight I could have achieved my goal much faster than I did. That said, I do not regret my roundabout path. The lessons learned and the experience gained are worth far more than the time I sacrificed to earn them.

But now it’s come. It’s time to claim my reward.

My vision of an ideal life has changed immensely from the night I made that promise to myself. My reward will reflect those changes. I see no point in buying the things that no longer suit the person I have become, so I have taken this time since we last talked to search my innermost soul.

I sat Katie down and gave her the news. Like you, I swore her to silence. For some reason, I feel the need to keep this success private in the real world. Perhaps it is the result of spending decades being criticized. I’ve been called crazy far too many times over the years to share my achievement with them.

Once Katie digested the information she reminded me of a promise I’d made several years back. Both of my daughters have been pressuring me to acquire a cell phone; they worry for my safety. I promised them that I would grant their request the moment I could afford the exact cell phone I wanted. Since I could easily afford the purchase now, she told me it was time to pay up.

I did.

After that purchase we began to purge. It isn’t a new life if I cling to the detrius from my old one. While I’d initially planned to relocate to a new place for this phase, the Coronavirus situation has changed my plans. I will start right here, where I am, and move if and when I feel it is both safe and logical to do so.

As we purge, we are debating upon color schemes, whether we want to invest in wallpaper, paint, or some other combination, and the furniture that will convert our haven from the home of someone who has carefully hoarded her pennies to the sanctum of a woman who will spend the remainder of her days in comfort.

Katie is so impressed with my achievement that she has decided to launch her own path to financial freedom. She took some classes and started an aromatherapy business locally. Her business has been so successful that she’s decided to take it online. While she is nervous about opening an official website just yet, she made the leap to the online world by opening an Etsy account. You can visit her page here:

https://www.etsy.com/shop/WholesomePotions

I feel an immense satisfaction in knowing that I can help guide my daughter on her own path to financial freedom. While she isn’t as driven as I was (she is determined to become a doctor), she has seen the logic in establishing an income that isn’t reliant upon a single corporate source. Given our current economic climate, she may need that freedom as she completes college.

The beauty of my plan to achieve financial freedom is that you can start anywhere. Lower your bills as far as you can, use your skills to create new sources of income, and invest your excess for passive income. Diversify to cover yourself in the event of economic adversity. This not only allows you a backup income source, it enables you to continue growing your passive income over time.

And, like me, once you achieve financial freedom, you can keep or discard your frugal ways as you see fit. While I doubt that I will ever become a spendthrift, I am definitely allowing myself the things that give me pleasure now that I can easily afford them.

The need for financial freedom is stronger than ever now as more and more people are losing the jobs they counted on to pay their bills. Having lived through this before, I can state with certainty that now is the perfect time to launch your path to freedom. I hope that you will join me.

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If you happen to find this post helpful, would you consider sharing it with a friend or on social media?  Thanks!

I’ve written a lot of books sharing my odd view of life in hopes of helping others. My most notorious book is titled The Shoestring Girl: How I Live on Practically Nothing and You Can Too, but The Minimalist Cleaning Method is pretty popular as well. You can find them at the following places:

Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Apple iBooks
Smashwords (non-DRM)

Thank you for your support!